Posts

Anxiety Busting in 5 Minutes Flat

The physiology of anxiety / stress shows that the body goes into Sympathetic mode (fight, flight or freeze) initiating a range of highly predictable responses, such as increased heart rate, breathing rate, circulatory changes etc.

Though the response is autonomic (involuntary) there are ways we can voluntarily reverse it.

Two muscles in particular can be gently guided back to their resting state, sending the message back to the brain to return to calm concentration (rest & digest / parasympathetic response).

These muscles are the diaphragm and the psoas.

The simplest and most direct way to access these muscles is through the combination of visualization, stretch and breathing.

As with any change, the more we can apply gentleness, conscious attention and consistency, the more lasting the results.

This sequence can be done in a concentrated five minutes or stretched out / repeated over a relaxed twenty minutes.

Step 1.

Notice normal, natural breathing.

Pay attention to the sensations at the base of the lungs (your diaphragm).

Place your hands at the lower ribs to notice natural movement.

Next, pay attention to any deep sensation in the abdomen as you breathe (your psoas).

Use the diagram above to clearly locate your psoas within your physical experience.

This step is important.

It will see that you’re not forceful or impatient leading to a rebound effect.

Step 2.

Gently stretch the diaphragm with your inhale.

Hold the breath in and use the volume “bubble” of air to stretch the surrounding tissues such as the muscles between the ribs, the sides of the waist, even “bearing down” into the abdomen*

This alone is a fascinating exercise.

When used regularly you’ll gain tremendous confidence in applying the biomechanics of the body for particular outcome.

Curiosity and gradual extension of your comfort zone go a long way in achieving the desired result.

You can even feel the biochemical changes from cortisol to endorphins (as well as serotonin and oxytocin) over just a few breaths. You’ll experience it as an oxygenated overall tingling, sometimes described as the vibration of wellbeing.

*this practice can completely alter the way you breath for the better, but best avoided if you have history of oesophageal weakness or hernia.

Step 3.

Side stretch

Especially useful is the combination of thoracic rotation with lateral extension ie turning the chest open as you reach your arm over head. This can be done from standing or sitting position.

Inflate the open side with your inhale.

Engage your core stability (abdomen and pelvic floor) with your exhale.

Breathing in this way is a simple “release here” and “engage here” suggestion you can apply anywhere anytime.

Step 4.

Lunge with side stretch 

Place your finger tips to the ground outside your bent leg (same hand as front foot).

You may wish to lower back knee to the ground.

Reach your opposite arm over head.

Breath from hip to lower ribs with your inhale (to your psoas).

Engage your core stability (abdomen and pelvic floor) with your exhale.

This is the most specific stretch for the psoas as it lengthens the whole muscle from origin at your lumbar spine to insertion at the head of your thigh bone.

Step 5.

Relax

Child pose (kneeling, sit hips on heels, rest head toward the floor) or Constructive Rest Pose (lying on back, knees raised feet to floor) 

Both postures place the psoas and diaphragm in a neutral position where they can “drape” into a more relaxed and functional state.

Continuing to breathe through the diaphragm to your psoas.

Pay attention to the overall effect of the release.

Unlike other forms of stress release, such as exercise or counselling, this practice is a shortcut to rewiring your physiology.

It requires no "venting". It encourages no dwelling. It sets up no authority, and requires no psychoanalysis. It involves no avoidance. It simply, and directly, places you in a more powerful position to choose.

How Body Whispering came about.

I had become the person I did NOT want to be.   

I called myself "the dragon lady".   

I could no longer justify venting at my family because "I was stressed."

What did I have to be stressed about?   

I had a beautiful, big, glassy house on the river in one of the most prestigious suburbs.   

I had a super-spunky, dedicated husband and two healthy, happy kids.   

I'd been raised in a loving home, given the best education, ran my own business, had a huge group of friends.... 

What more could I want?  

More money?  

More attention?  

More status?  

More influence?  

That wasn't going to stop my dragon lady rearing her ugly head!

I realised nothing outside of me could ever satiate my inner-most need.

I saw more and more that this low level anxiety at which we all seemed to be functioning could be broken... and if it could be broken... even momentarily.... surely it could be broken.... for life.

I found myself speaking more and more about Naturopathic principals of "ease" in contrast to dis-ease.

I experienced more and more with clients their sheer and utter relief.

Not long after this, Body Whispering was coined by one of my longest and dearest clients, Maxine Williamson.

Together, we tried and tested and proved the theory that 

- we could afford to be at ease

- that the body knew

- that stress was a symptom

- that we could trust the innate being.

The more bodies I worked with, the more confirmation I had that the body is intrinsically inclined to wellbeing.

Clients started telling me about 

- old injuries that spontaneously cleared

-  effortlessly eating well

- better relationships

- higher libido

- increased mojo.

At the experiential level, Body Whispering, re-conditions a trust in the natural order of things.

By placing our very physiology in this conditioned state of ease, all things that flow from it, are grown from the soil of ease.

If we are to become whole once again, in the true meaning of the word "to heal", it all begins with a deep underlying trust that we are worthy of being at ease.

I would like to thank the many clients who have been willing to build such trusting relationships over the years.

Your honesty, open-ness and enthusiasm has been my inspiration and my motivation.   Body Whispering is dedicated to you, and to your generations, to come.

The only thing that makes a woman feel truly sexy

Is it attention from men?

Is it having the body she wants?

Is it the feeling she's better than someone else?

FREAK NO!!!!!

The one thing that makes a woman feel sexy is the ability to stand in her own power.

That comes from knowing herself, treating herself, carrying herself and cultivating herself.

It's the same thing that puts baby's in and brings baby's out.

It's the same thing that gives a woman confidence in the board room... 

and on the stage... 

and in front of the camera.

It's the same thing that created you, and the same thing that will receive you when you pass.

It's the life force pulsing in your very veins.

It's the cocktail of oxytocin, endorphins, oestrogen and progesterone that gives you the gift you were born with... 

It's your ability to feel.

It's your ability to choose to receive ever-increasing life-lust!

It's your friggin femininity

 and there ain't nothin' flouncy about that!

The Body Whispering Premise

What if I told you, you had been fed a big, fat lie...

This myth - so deeply ingrained - is this:

"The body is flawed. 

Left to it's own devices, it will succumb to laziness, and grow fat.

Unless I push myself, I will never truly be happy."

Most of us have been so conditioned to believe in the "No pain, no gain" mentality we are not even aware of it ourselves!

What if I told you the struggle and strain was exactly what is getting in the way?

That's right!

The pushing and forcing our way through life is exactly what is wreaking havoc with our neuro-immuno-endocrine systems. (Pittman, 2011, Singh et al., 2015)

Left to it's own devices, the body rebounds back to balance.

This fact is the mechanism of Homeostasis.  Proposed first by Claude Bernard in 1865 and scientifically accepted for the last 150 years.

"So, if it's so easy to follow my innate urge to be well, why haven't I heard about this approach before?"

I have had to ask this myself... many times before... and the answer is this....

You will most definitely have come across this thinking before... the shift from anti-biotics to pro-biotics ie from working against, to now working 'with', the realisation that we don't need to "push" out babies during birth, hypnosis for giving up smoking - because it's what the body wants .... we are on the very crux of realising the potency of homeostasis.  I am certainly not the first.

What you are unlikely to have come across before, is its practical application ie how to use homeostasis, and this, I believe is purely due to long-standing inter-generational beliefs and the favouring of complex theories over simple common sense.

"Surely, you're not saying I don't have to use ANY will power to get results?"

Of course not!  That would be ludicrous!

What I AM saying, however, is that will power is like adrenaline.   Super effective at getting us over the hump, but too much will power (aka force) and we end up feeling deprived, depleted and swinging on and off the bandwagon again.

The discipline of Body Whispering is the discipline of aligning with the body's intrinsic urge.

This single principal is how those using Body Whispering today have broken free of

          depriving themselves

          comparing themselves

          using negativity or harshness to get motivated

          .... once and for all!

Can you image how much better you'd feel over a single day, let alone over a decade or a lifetime?

In a nutshell:

When we rest on homeostasis as the foundation of health...

we connect with the sensory / intrinsic urge to respond...

 - we move regularly and we eat uber-well 

- and we get proper rest... because it feels great!

When these basic facets of health are in place, we are emotionally and mentally well...  our relationships flourish... our career cranks... and we find ourselves living well!

It's time to connect with your intrinsic motivation...

the deep urge inside...

to be uber-well...

the urge that is dependant on no-one...

outlasts will-power everytime...

cannot be taken away from you...

and never-runs out.

References

Pittman, D. Q. J. (2011), A Neuro-Endocrine-Immune Symphony. Journal of Neuroendocrinology, 23: 1296–1297. doi:10.1111/j.1365-2826.2011.02176.x

Singh, V.P, Khandelwal, B, Sherpa, N.T. (2015)  Psycho-neuro-endocrine-immune mechanisms of action of yoga in type II diabetes Anc Sci Life. 35(1): 12–17. doi:10.4103/0257-7941.165623

Torday, J. S. (2015). Homeostasis as the Mechanism of Evolution. Biology, 4(3), 573–590. http://doi.org/10.3390/biology4030573

Torday, J.S (2015) The cell as the mechanistic basis for evolution.Wiley Interdiscip Rev Syst Biol Med.7(5):275-84. doi: 10.1002/wsbm.1305. 

One Manifesto

This simple Manifesto has served us since our humble beginnings in 2012.

It has, to this day, kept us true to form, and applies to Body Whispering like never before.

It can be summarised as:

"No dogma; No rules.  Just using what you've got as tools."


1. First do no harm.

Don't judge.  Just observe.

Where possible, practice non-intervention.

Where necessary, the subtlest nudge will do.

2. Lead by Example.

The most effective way to make change is by showing the way yourself.

3. Invest in the Present.

The past and the future are creations of the mind.  

Value exists in this moment now.

4. Trust Yourself Before all else.

Your only accurate experience is that of sensation.

All else is a reflection of changing thoughts.

5. The Whole is Greater than the Sum of it's Parts.

Wholism accounts for that which reductionism cannot.

6. Effort toward Effortlessness.

Energy used wisely returns multiplied.

Five Essential Lessons Crisis teaches us all

A map would be ideal, of course, but crisis management is not a matter of one-size-fits all.

When faced with an aspect of disintegration, most find themselves at a loose end at some point.

Granted, my first-world experience of crisis is not even a flesh wound when compared with poverty, torture or war, but having said that, there are obvious gaps in our social management of crisis that even most therapists won’t acknowledge.

By no means is this article meant to dismiss the complexity of crisis, nor the value of a therapist, but I hope if nothing else, it serves to give some direction to an otherwise confused and isolating world.

1. We are all experts in self-justification

We’ve all used excuses to avoid change:

-     My career / my income

-     The kids …. are the biggest ones.

But, what about those we don’t want to admit to ourselves:

-     My social standing

-     My parents / other family members

-     My health

It’s blindingly obvious when a friend gives an excuse, but can you be honest enough to admit excuses you tell yourself?

I hope this helps to consciously move into or accept crisis, despite the fear.

2. There is a way to tell the difference between a valid reason and an excuse.

Ask yourself a series of honesty questions - a reliable check as to how your gut response matches your long term values, vision and goals.

How would I feel in ten years time, if the situation remained unchanged?

How would I feel about it on my death bed?

What would I want my daughter / son to do in this situation?

What would my mentor / teacher do in this situation?

How does it affect my self worth?

These are questions that involve any number of factors ie they cannot be answered with a single rational response.

Therefor, write them down, answer them several times (in different moods), but most importantly, ask them of your deeper self.   The most accurate response will be one comes when you are connected to your unchanging self, as in during deep meditation.   If you do not have time for meditation, then draw on a teacher to structure it into your life.

3. We can always afford to restructure our lives

“No matter how well-built the house, if the foundation is not strong, the house will fall.”

Since the major restructuring of my life I have attracted clients also looking for the courage to create real and lasting change.

Even if you are very willing to take risks on the professional front, you may delay taking action on a personal domain until it’s too late.

Some have decided to use the term “Conscious Break Down” indicating the value of disassembling by choice.

No matter what your situation, the question is not so much “Can I afford to restructure my life?” but “How can I afford NOT to?”

4.  Most things are really not important.... Those that are, are worth the sacrifice of EVERYTHING ELSE.

The most important thing in any crisis is to know what you are willing to sacrifice and what you simply WILL NOT.

Yes, I’m talking about an actual list!  Ideally, narrow it down to one thing.

This one thing is the light at the end of the tunnel.

When all around you is black and unknown, you will still have the ability to point and go.  You'll know, without doubt, the sacrifice is worthwhile.

Remember, your whole world is disintegrating and re-ordering.  There will be times of utter mess, confusion at every level and even dark…dim…flat.

You cannot rely on what worked, or even who you were before.

You are going to need this light more than anything else in the world.

For me, this light is the quality of my relationships – with my children, my family, my closest friends and my clients.  It is without question, THE thing that has kept me sane when absolutely everything else was, well… gone.

5.  You may not be who you think you are

Your “self” may have been adapted to suit any number of influences in your life, such as:

-     your parental or birth family’s expectations

-     your spouse or married family’s expectations

-     your peer or social expectations

-     your work or professional expectations

-     your cultural or political expectations

Crisis highlight your unchanging self from your “adapted self” in a way no other experience can.

The ability to observe without reacting is an essential skill.  It is not one we are born with, it is one we can only acquire over time.

You may observe your true (unchanging) self is quite different to the self that has been conditioned over time. 

The more you are able to observe - like a scientist - the sooner you will accept yourself... as you truly are.

 6.  A force field is essential

You will be judged, no matter what.  The question is, how much energy are you willing to invest to argue your case to those who judge?

Shame is a part of any crisis.   No one wants to be associated with struggle or - let’s face it - anything much “outside the norm”.

In my experience, it is better to let these “friends” go and zip up the force field so as not to waste precious energy needed for a deep personal breaking through.

7.  There is little place for crisis in a conservative culture

Bringing terms such as “mental health day”, “conscious break down” and “break through” to the every day is a step in the right direction but if you’ve been in crisis, you’re likely to find, most people – unconsciously, of course – will do anything to avoid talking about the elephant in the room.

There is no doubt that vulnerability is considered a weakness in our culture though it is an unavoidable part of being human.

In the same way an animal in labour, knowing she will be vulnerable for a window of time, seeks the safest place for birth, the best we can do, when crisis takes hold, is to find “safe space” for ourselves.

You may be surprised to find ways you previously felt safe, such as with your spouse, friends or birth family, are unable to meet this deeper need.

Be patient and educate them, by all means (use this video as a start).  Those that are worth it will come through in the end. 

In the immediate term gather people, places and processes by which you feel you can be exactly as you are. 

Instinct is heightened when required.  Trust it.  You will recognise true safety at your very core.

8.  There is no time frame for crisis

Indeed, time takes on a different quality altogether when restructuring takes place.

You may find a more earth-based sense of time allows for the ebbs and flows of internal change.

It has, after all, been a relatively short period in the earth’s history, that we have used such a linear sense of time.

An earth-based sense of time is cyclic.  On a small scale and large scale, we can more readily see how we are growing and changing on a continuum of which we are only a part.

Though this may cause disruption in your immediate world, it is worth articulating and finding support.

Most importantly, do whatever is required to take the pressure off and allow the time and space as you need.

9.        No one is wise enough by him/her self

Indeed crisis is the time to contact your core…to touch the very stuff of which you are made.

But it’s not the time for “going it alone”, “proving anything to anyone” or taking on any more than the basic priorities today.

Reach out.  Be honest.  Find your tribe.  Don’t apologise for what it is that you need.

There is no use walking around half empty.  Do whatever it takes to fill your tank to the brim.

We need people in society who can walk the walk, not just “hold it together” or tread water with a smile.

10.  There are undefined forces at play

Even scientists recognise the limitations of science.

It is a fact that not everything can be explained.

So on days spent in bed or when things just don’t add up, remember these higher organising forces at play.

They are stronger than will power, more powerful than logic, beyond human capacity in every way.

Observe nature…her patience…her lack of intervention…her ability to adapt and evolve without strain.

We simply are not wise enough by ourselves… so be gentle with your limitations today.